


Hope Renewed

by Pinkybruce



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex/Astra - Freeform, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-27
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-23 11:57:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6115729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinkybruce/pseuds/Pinkybruce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>set after ep 1.13 where Alex does not kill Astra, but merely wounds her instead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Alex stepped forward, her momentum driving the kryptonite sword upwards through Astra’s lower back, with barely a hint of force. Her only thought was preventing Astra from taking an action that could never be undone. If nothing else, she was Kara’s aunt, and Alex was so sure she’d been getting through to her in the moments before J’onn had wrenched Astra back and away from her. 

Astra staggered, slipping to her knees, mouth agape in a silent scream, sword protruding from beneath her ribs, her hands clenching helplessly at her sides. Capturing her wrists, Alex tugged Astra’s arms behind her, securing kryptonite manacles firmly in place. Only then did she remove the sword from Astra’s side, eliciting a whimpering cry of pain from the General.

Alex watched the blood seep from Astra’s back as the wound slowly closed in. The kryptonite cuffs so close to the wound are preventing Astra from healing fully and Alex fears she’s bleeding internally. She tends to Astra’s wounds as best she can with field dressings from various pockets and pouches in her combat uniform before fixing a kryptonite collar around Astra’s throat. She cannot afford to lose Astra now, but she won’t risk her escaping again when she’s so close to bringing her back to Kara. 

Astra sags at Alex’s feet, defeated and broken as Kara arrives in a flurry of wind and tossed up gravel. “Aunt Astra?” Looking to Alex Kara demands “Alex, what happened? You need to take these restraints off her. She’s not healing.” Kara looks more panicked than Alex can ever remember seeing her. Before she can answer Astra has whispered “please forgive me little one” her eyes closing as she slips into unconsciousness.

Having seen Astra’s soldiers approaching in the distance Alex rushes her sister “Kara, Kara, we have to go. Now!” Kara has scooped Astra into her arms and is gone before Alex can move. Stepping forward she slings her arms around J’onn’s shoulders, her stomach roiling at the sudden motion of flying so quickly. 

At the DEO Kara has deposited Astra on her side on a gurney in the med bay and is fussing helplessly over her by the time Alex arrives. Alex takes the briefest moment to survey the scene before her before shooing Kara out of her way and stepping to the table. She unlocks the restraints holding Astra’s arms behind her back and gently rolls Astra onto her back, settling her arms at her sides. For the moment the collar remains in place. 

Alex fingers the cut at the front of Astra’s suit where the sword sliced though, gently prying it away from her wound. Astra’s skin has closed over, nothing more than a line of discoloured skin remains to indicate what she has endured. A slight groan draws Alex’s eyes to Astra’s face. Astra’s eyes flutter open, slowly fixing on Alex as she comes into focus. “Thank you” she whispers, acknowledging the removal of the restraints which have allowed her to heal enough to stop the internal bleeding at least. Without removal of the collar, they both know Astra will remain too weak to fully heal or make any attempt at escape. For now it is a pain Astra must endure.

Because Kara is there now, gently nudging Alex out of her way before clasping Astra’s hand in both of her own, threading their fingers together and smiling like the sun, telling Astra how scared she was, how she loves her, her words tumbling out amidst her tears and gentle fussing. And Astra knows this pain is worth it to see Kara look at her with such love and devotion and to hear the hope in her niece’s voice as she tells her how different things will be now. 

To further her healing Alex has placed Astra under the sun lamps. She steadfastly refuses to remove the kryptonite collar despite Kara’s insistent pleas. “The collar will come off once she’s safely in a cell” Alex tells Kara, “and not a moment before. I was getting through to her Kara, but I also had to stop her from killing J’onn. She isn’t here of her own choosing. At least not yet. We need time to figure out what side Astra is truly on and I won’t risk any more lives until we know for sure. I’m sorry, but that is how it is.” 

And so Kara waited by Astra’s side while she slept under the lamps, until eventually the inevitable call came from CatCo, Cat Grant summoning her to attend to her latest want, need or disaster. As Kara left she entreated Alex to look after her aunt and to inform her of any changes the instant Astra woke up. 

Alex dismissed the doctors and remained alone in the med bay with Astra while she caught up on overdue reports and paperwork. There never seemed to be enough time these days. Alien threats seemed more prevalent than ever, despite Fort Rozz having impacted with earth over a decade ago. Alex cannot understand why now, when nothing seems to have changed to cause the increased activity.

Looking up she meets Astra’s gaze across the room. Astra is watching her intently, curiosity shining in her eyes. Alex slips off the stool and away from the bench she has made her temporary workspace, and makes her way to Astra’s side. She flicks off the sun lamps one by one, taking her time moving around the gurney and sliding the lamps back across the floor to their resting places by the walls.

She finally comes to stand by Astra’s right side and makes a show of inspecting her wound again, fingers gently pushing and probing against the muscles of Astra’s stomach and side. Astra watches her patiently, breathing steadily, no indication that she is feeling any pain although Alex knows that she hasn’t fully healed because the faint line remains where the sword pierced her skin. Alex meets her gaze, finally nudging the collar at Astra’s throat with her fingertips when Astra shows no sign of breaking her gaze or giving anything away. Astra sighs and closes her eyes, knowing when she is temporarily defeated.

Alex smirks to herself as she watches Astra concede defeat in the only way she knows how; with quiet dignity. They are very much alike although she will never admit it. “Can you walk?” Alex asks softly. “I assume we are about to find out” Astra states, opening her eyes again and attempting to sit up. Even without the restraints, the collar is keeping her in a weakened state and she requires Alex’s help to shift into a seated position. She wants nothing more than to scowl and decline the proffered hand but is not too proud to admit when she needs help. And what would be the point anyway she muses. Both she and Alex know that she is in Alex’s hands now and for better or worse, she has no choice but to comply with Alex’s demands.

The door to the cell slides open and Alex manoeuvres Astra through, one arm about her waist, the other resting on Astra’s stomach in an attempt to keep her upright. Astra turns and lowers herself backwards onto the bench seat and leans back against the supportive glass, eyes closed with pain and exhaustion. Alex steps forward, leaning down into her space, causing Astra’s eyes to flutter open in surprise and her hands to clench at her sides. Their eyes lock as Alex states softly “it didn’t have to be this way.” She maintains Astra’s gaze as she unlocks and removes the kryptonite collar from its place encircling her throat. Astra finally looks away, uncomfortable and closes her eyes again as the first waves of relief wash over her now that the collar is gone. It is easier at this point to simply hide inside herself. Lord knows there’s nothing here in this bleak, empty cell to hide behind. 

After long moments of silence during which neither moves Astra tips her head back against the glass and raises her eyes resolutely to once again meet Alex’s gaze. Alex allows herself a small internal chuckle as she muses over Astra’s defiance and strength, even when wounded and imprisoned. It is not the first time she has felt admiration for the soldier before her, or strangely enough, a sense of pride in her, maybe because she is Kara’s aunt? She really isn’t sure why. 

She is therefore all the more surprised at what Astra says next. “Forgive me.” Astra states. And it is a statement, yet a question at the same time. And all of a sudden she looks so open and earnest, a hint of pleading in the slight twist of her lips after she speaks. Alex’s eyes widen and she shifts backwards, quite literally taken aback by the absolute vulnerability and beauty before her. She has never felt Astra in such a way before, never seen her as anything other than unbreakably strong, even after General Lane subjected her to liquid kryptonite, injected directly into her veins. 

“I never wanted any of this…” Astra whispers, “… to hurt Kara ... You ... I lost one world, lost my way. This isn't who I am… At least it wasn't.” Astra shakes her head softly in confusion. “Kara is my family. And you are her family. You say we are nothing but I disagree. You are everything to Kara and she is everything to me. You and I, we are … something. I may not ever fully earn your trust or forgiveness but I beg you, please, for Kara's sake, try? I give you my word; I will forsake Non and my army to help find another way.” 

Alex opens her mouth but is unsure what to say. She is underprepared for the level of emotion she has felt at the General’s speech. Underprepared for the intensity of Astra’s eyes beseeching her to trust in her once again. Alex simply nods her head mutely and returns Astra’s gaze.

With some difficulty Astra stands and steps forward, resting her bloodied hand against Alex's shoulder, her need to be understood more than just emotional. Alex notices how weary she looks, and dirty, her torn suit covered in grit and drying blood. Alex raises her arm to clasp Astra by the elbow, holding her steady in place while she summons a guard, turning her head to the side to quietly murmur her instructions for what she needs.

Alex guides Astra backwards to the bench; both hands grasping her arms now to steady her and lower her gently back down. The guard returns presently with a dish of warm soapy water, some small towels and a folded change of clothes tucked under her arm and a bag of take-away food gripped tightly in her other hand. “Leave us.” Alex commands. She takes the proffered items and lays them out beside Astra along the bench. “First let's clean you up, then you eat” she says. Astra nods weakly, compliant under Alex's firm hands. 

Alex fingers the zip at the front of Astra's suit and slowly pulls it downwards. Astra leans slowly forward into her as Alex slides the suit back down over her shoulders, exposing her torso. Next she removes Astra's boots and gently helps her to stand. Astra's hands rest on her shoulders as Alex slips the suit down over Astra’s hips, pooling it at her feet. Astra steps forward into Alex's arms, Alex's hands at her waist offering steady solid support. Astra kicks the suit away tiredly. 

“Can you stand unsupported?” Alex asks. Astra nods, eyes half closed and shifts away from the bench to a clear section of wall space which she uses to prop herself up. Alex wets a small cloth and begins to gently wipe away the drying blood, first down Astra's front, in broad gentle strokes, then turning her to the wall, Astra's forehead resting against the glass, as Alex repeats the process to remove the blood streaked down her back. 

Alex rests a hand gently on Astra's side, applying slight pressure to pull her around to face her again. Alex pulls one of her soft, well-worn training t-shirts from the small pile of clothing on the bench seat and helps Astra to slip her arms through the sleeve holes, tugging it gently over her head. She can tell Astra is fading, exhausted and in serious need of food and rest. Even with the kryptonite collar gone, the kryptonite setting in the room is switched on and it has been a long night.

Alex helps Astra to step each leg into the soft track pants and once again lowers her to the bench where Astra leans back into the glass behind her. Weary yet hopeful eyes meet soft concerned ones. “Can you eat?” asks Alex. Astra simply nods. 

Finally Alex smiles and gives a brief chuckle. “If you're anything like Kara you'll love these” she says, rustling open the paper take out bag and retrieving a large container of pot stickers. “Are you ok to use your fingers or do you want to try with chopsticks?” Alex pauses shyly “… or I can feed you?”

Astra looks indignant. “I am no child. I can feed myself” but Alex sees the strain it's taking her just to stay awake now. “There's no shame in letting me help you. Consider it a step towards building trust between us?” Alex says softly. Astra relents and Alex feeds her pot stickers, one by one until the container rests empty in her hands. 

“Sleep now, you need to rest, to heal. I'm going to turn the kryptonite down low. I'm trusting you to not try anything. Kara and J'onn will stop you if you try.” Alex gathers the remnants of Astra's meal and the water dish and towels and exits Astra's cell, the door snicking shut behind her as Astra sinks back onto the bench, already asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a continuation of the development of the relationship between Alex and Astra.

In the ensuing weeks that follow her capture, Astra comes to look forward to time spent in Kara’s company, whenever Kara’s position at CatCo allows. Reminiscing is difficult for both, but learning of Kara’s time on earth lifts Astra’s spirits above the periods of boredom in-between visits, and she devours every story that Kara offers up; those involving Alex, for a reason she cannot yet identify, are particularly pleasing. Even more so she comes to look forward to the snippets of time spent with Alex, in her cell or even in Kryptonite restraints in Alex’s office. Alex’s office is Spartan yet holds a few precious symbols of warmth in the form of personal trinkets and such like. 

The sofa against the far wall with a grey woollen army-issue blanket folded neatly at one end and a beat up, lumpy cushion that clearly serves as a pillow, smells so much like Alex that Astra wonders if she ever sleeps anywhere else. Several battered books line an old metal army book case and a framed photo of Alex together with Kara as children, and standing near two unidentified adults, adorns Alex’s desk. This is her favourite place, in Alex’s office, watching her type notes as Astra divulges secret after secret about what is now Non’s army, and their plans for the future of humankind. ‘Non’s plans’ Astra reminds herself. 

Astra has memorised this space and Alex’s personal effects, and tentatively asks for the history of each item as her time in captivity passes. Alex looks at her curiously with each almost timid request but acquiesces and tells her stories of Kara, of growing up together, of how hard it was when Kara first came to them, broken and alone and afraid. Astra likes these times the best; brief moments where Alex shines as she smiles, eyes turned inward as she, for the most part, remembers happier and more carefree days. 

With each passing day Astra finds herself looking forward more and more intently to Alex’s arrival on the base. She is frustrated and bored, but more than willing to do whatever it takes to re-build trust between them. Alex has trusted her a sum total of two times before. Of those occurrences, only one resulted in Kara being saved; from a telepathic parasite called the Black Mercy. The other resulted in the deaths of six agents. Astra is not so foolish as to think that the one will cancel out the other. Trust takes time and while she hopes her efforts will be enough, she understands they may never be.

To help pass time when left alone in her cell she attunes her hearing to Alex’s heartbeat, able to follow her, just barely, when she is in the base; feeling safer when she knows Alex is ok and present.

It is not long before Non launches an all-out assault against the DEO, hell bent on freeing his General, his wife, from captivity until Kara lets slip in the heat of battle that Astra is there by choice, turncoat not prisoner, and is Non’s no more. 

The assault against the DEO rages for days, however the Kryptonians make no headway and lose many of their number for their efforts. Kryptonite and disruptors placed strategically at every entrance and throughout the base prevent the soldiers from breaching their defences, their own small shields useless against the sheer volume of kryptonite blocking their way. Equally as useless in this battle, Kara remains at CatCo, a safe distance from the kryptonite now reinforcing much of the base’s upper levels. 

Eventually a retreat is sounded; Non’s army now heavily depleted. With Supergirl’s support Alex leads a team against Fort Rozz and the remaining soldiers, offering captivity or death as the only two options to each alien they encounter. Having already lost their General and in light of heavy casualties already suffered, the battle waged is swift and fierce resulting in most of Non’s remaining army surrendering themselves rather than face certain death. Non himself remains mysteriously absent during the battle, leaving both Alex and Kara unsettled and aware that despite their current victory, the war is not yet won.

Despite the victory the DEO suffers several casualties during the battle, Alex herself among them, her wound surprisingly similar to the one she delivered to Astra so many weeks ago. Astra is fully healed, the kryptonite in her cell permanently switched to the lowest setting, more a symbol than any real security measure at this stage. It is clear that her intentions towards Kara and Alex are true and she is no threat; the wealth of information she has provided so freely all panning out and leading to numerous arrests and captures of Fort Rozz escapees.

On hearing Alex’s weak and thready heartbeat as Kara re-enters the base with Alex in her arms, Astra begs to be released from her cell. Hank consents, knowing she will likely smash her way out to get to Alex if he attempts to stop her anyway. Within seconds she has Alex in her arms and at the med bay, Kara trailing behind. It would be comical to see both Kryptonians wringing their hands helplessly beside Alex’s bedside, the medics constantly having to shoo them out of the way, if Alex hadn’t already lost so much blood.

Eventually Hank orders both from the room to allow the doctors time to do their work putting Alex back together. Both Kryptonians hover in the hallway, refusing to retreat any further and can only be appeased once they know Alex is safe and will be back to full strength after a week or two of enforced bed rest. 

From this moment on Astra is always by Alex’s bedside, or tucked into herself on Alex’s office couch where her scent remains the strongest. She isn’t sure why, she just knows that Alex is important, and not just because of Kara. She is important to Astra in her own right, perhaps because of the kindness she has shown, the faith she has tried and failed to hide, so much like Kara that it makes Astra smile to think of it. Alex is a light in her otherwise as yet grim future. She wonders what she means when she finds herself thinking ‘Alex is my future’ and pushes the thoughts from her mind as they cause a flutter of unbidden anxiety to rise in her gut.

Her bedside vigil is a reversal of their roles and both recognise it. Alex puts up no fight when Astra helps feed her in the first days of recovery following surgery, or when she helps Alex to bathe. Both simply acknowledge the reversal with quiet smiles and nods. Both watch each other shyly and continue to spill quiet secrets of their lives and stories of who they were up until the moment they first met. 

Alex is strong and her recovery fast under the watchful eye of the General and the very best team of doctors that government money can provide. Astra’s fear when Alex is finally on her feet again forces her to blurt out “And what of me now? Am I to go back to my cell?” The pained expression on her face and her nervous wringing of her hands is more than Alex can bear and she steps forward without hesitation, grasping Astra’s arms and saying “no” with more force than she means, and even though her movement didn’t start out with any intention to kiss Astra, Alex finds herself doing just that. 

The first time they kiss Astra is afraid, her previously unadmitted desire for Alex and her fears for her future so overwhelming it almost incapacitates her. The weeks of longing looks and shy smiles have not gone unnoticed by Alex, who is doing her best to remain professional and not encouraging, despite her own heart longing to feel Astra’s lips against her own, to feel her hands tangled in Astra’s hair, her weight above her, beneath her, anywhere so long as she is in Alex’s arms..

Alex knows it’s no use, her treacherous heart giving her away every time Astra shifts too near, touches her lightly, stares longingly into Alex’s eyes. She doesn’t even know when this feeling began, or from where, simply that it is and it feels like it has always been. She thinks back over the previous weeks and recognises the growing attachment now for what it is, her frequent trips to Astra’s cell showing themselves now as more than just expeditions to further her knowledge of Non’s plans. She recognises now, and admits what her heart has known all along, that she has wanted Astra from their very first encounter, as she lay in the dirt bleeding and wounded with Astra crouched menacingly above her.

Their first proper kiss is tentative and exploratory, tongues and lips soft and gentle against each other, breath hitching in throats. It doesn’t take long for the intensity to increase, the desire held barely in check by both threatens to consume them.

They break apart, panting lightly and staring into each other’s eyes with wonder and unbridled desire. Neither is shy now, just wanting, the heat between them palpable and almost alive. Alex looks around the med bay; she’s barely been given approval to stand or get dressed, let alone engage in any kind of sexual encounter. Especially one she knows will not be slow or romantic. There is time for that later, once they’ve burned through some of their initial fire.

Alex knows she needs Hank’s approval for Astra’s release. It has been nearly two months since Astra’s capture and they don’t even bother locking her cell anymore. Since Non’s defeat and subsequent disappearance and Kara returning with a wounded Alex to the base, Astra has been free to roam most of the base at her leisure. Mostly she has waited by Alex’s bedside watching over her recovery, eyes keen and distrusting of the doctors who fuss over Alex’s charts and form. Or sitting curled on Alex’s couch, feet beneath her, reading one of the many books Kara has brought her to keep her mind occupied while Alex is unconscious and when she isn’t helping out with some small task or other. She has already devoured the books on Alex’s shelf in an effort to know more about her, and roamed every inch of the small office space, inspecting Alex’s possessions in an attempt to feel connected to her while she waited for her to wake, as though she could draw Alex’s secrets from the inanimate objects through sheer force of will. 

Despite her plans to overtake National City and instigate MYRIAD, a means of subjugating the human race, not one human has yet died directly by Astra’s hand. Moreover, she has contained her army as best she could when in power, through her desire to reunite with Kara, and has given up every secret and plot and plan that she has held pertaining to Non’s plans for future assaults and so when Hank puts forward a case for Astra’s release, she is granted clemency, even despite the protestations of one General Lane. 

Hank already has the release order signed and approved when Alex comes to him from the med bay, a wild look in her eyes and clothes askew. It is not the first time he has wished he did not have mind reading abilities where Alex is concerned. As soon as it is done, Astra has Alex in her arms and is flying her to Alex’s apartment, both acknowledging the urgent need to be alone together and away from the base for what is about to occur. 

Astra pauses only long enough to wrench open a window before Alex finds herself up against her lounge room wall, being thoroughly kissed as Astra attempts to remove her clothing without shredding it entirely. 

Their fucking is passionate and heated, rough and desperate with a need neither of them fully understood that they had. For the first few times at least. By the time they’ve each orgasmed for the sixth time, they’ve slowed to a more gentle yet emotionally intense connection, lying beside each other and chuckling gently at the broken coffee table and the holes Astra’s fingers have gouged in the walls and floor, and the kitchen table she has literally torn in half as Alex fucked her from behind and she gripped the table from either side as she came, a great almighty crack down the middle as they tumbled forward onto the floor laughing and gasping, the two halves of the table collapsing to either side of them. 

And yet neither can seem to care about the wanton destruction around them, or the level of noise they must have made. It’s during the day so Alex hopes her neighbours are still at work. Beyond this time has held no meaning for either of them; just touch and taste and sight and sound, wrapped up in each other so completely the world could have ended around them without either noticing. They raid the fridge for leftovers, and lie on the mattress now on the floor, watching each other with soft eyes and gentle smiles, neither knowing what will come next, but both instinctively knowing it will be faced together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is finished. I guess I will see if anything else tumbles out of my head. Please feel free to leave comments, suggestions, critique etc. I am very new to writing and don't have anyone to edit my work so am totally open to other people's thoughts about what I have created. Mostly, I really just hope that whoever reads this enjoys it. :)

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first foray into attempting to write fanfiction. I'm very nervous about it but I did enjoy writing it so I hope that comes across, and that it is enjoyable to read. I am very receptive to feedback, as there is much that I could learn about this process and writing generally. So please comment, whether constructive improvements or positive. Thanks for reading. :)


End file.
